Seriously? Why NOW?

I finally got a new job. One I wanted a while ago. It pays, it has hours. I should be ecstatic. I was surface when I got it, but after the initial shock, I didn't really care. This was the job, the lynch-pin, that my entire life was holding on to. Why can't I care? I just started making friends at my current job. Something that is almost impossible for me to do. And the boy....... I give my two weeks to my boss tomorrow. I have to weeks to make a move, or say something.... I need to. I have too many regrets when it comes to guys. I'm going to try to keep a few hours at my current job if I can, and I know I say it's for the extra money and partly it is, but now......maybe so I happen to see him. SEE!!! This is what I hate about liking someone. You start to try to incorporate them into your life, something that may not be good for you.

Gasp!

I feel. Not a lot mind you, but maybe a flicker. It always happens when someone relatively cute pays you a compliment, and then pays a little more attention to you then you are used to. And so it begins, you only feel because of the adrenaline rush. You find it horrible that you go out of your ways to make your stomach drop, your heart stop, and you stutter. And that is the only way you can feel what it used to be like. It's not the person. It's the lingerings of distant feelings. Ones I so desperately want to feel again.