Friday, February 8, 2013
I Never Fucking Asked You
I never asked you to say you loved me
I never asked for you to tell me
That I'm the one who makes it all better
When you are the one who makes me bitter
I'm so amazing and you mean it
I'm so delightful and you see it
But the one you see
Isn't really me you like
I never asked you to say I'm lovely
I never asked for you to be there
Yet I'm the one who'll make it all better
When you're the one who'll make me so bitter
I'm the perfect one you don't see
I'm the right one you cannot find
And you never see
What you've done to me, and us
You've never heard me say I loved you
And though it breaks me every day
You are the one who makes my life better
And I will risk my heart to be bitter
I'll never know if you mean what you say
And I don't know if I want to
(In progress)
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I NEVER ASKED
You wrote me letters for my birthday
We kissed and talked for hours under the stars
Atop your car
Never thinking
In a little while,
How much of me I’d give…to see you smile
I thought right here
Right now
Was just fine
But I was blind
By the stars in your eyes and the mesmerizing quality of your mind
I never ever asked you
To tell me
You loved me.
Is that what
You thought
I wanted
To hear?
My hate-to-love…my elvish one…my dear?
You wrote your number
On a paper airplane Valentine
We were strangers holding hands
In Star Wars
Saying lines
Like we didn’t know the meaning of time
I thought right here
Right now
Was just fine
But I was blind
By the stars in your eyes and the fine, mesmerizing quality of your mind
I never ever asked you
To tell me
You loved me.
Is that what
You thought
I wanted
To hear?
Mi caro…my Han Solo…my dear?
You were like my brother
When all the others
Tore me in two
You knew
And so I smothered all my doubts
Just one more time
Hoping I’d be safe with you
You’d never tell me anything that wasn’t true
Wouldn’t you?
Because I thought maybe
Someday
You could be mine
But I was blind
By the stars in your eyes and the fine, mesmerizing quality of your mind
My wise guy …my Dark Side…my dear?
Did you ever f*cking stop to think
Could you ever f*cking comprehend
That I would have loved you anyway
I would have loved you all my days
But I would never ever EVER say
Anything that wasn’t true
And here I am
No demands
Heart in my hand
Hating that it’s still in love with you
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